Just a quick post about 2014. The good, the bad and the ugly. (Since it will be quick, it will probably be incomplete, but oh well.)
The good - Where to start?
-A new grandson - pictures here
-Sister Rietz serving in the California Rancho Cucamonga Mission. She's 7 months in and going strong. You can follow her adventure at her blog
-Teaching Seminary. Who knew I would love it so much? And love it I do. I have a great class who show up, stay awake and are a joy to meet with 5 mornings a week - see this post
-Thanksgiving with the family. see this post
-The first Roommate Rendevous - see this post
-Many good books - Non-fiction seemed to be my genre this year - here is one I really enjoyed
-Watching my family continue to grow and seeing the great people they are becoming - you'll have to peruse the blog to find examples. I'm sure I included plenty! :)
This is just a sample of the good. So many things to remember and to be grateful for. I hope I appreciated and will continue to appreciate them enough.
The bad - Luckily not the longest list, but still long enough...
-Too many people we know passed away too soon - here is one story
-We didn't go to Australia - I could list this under "ugly" because it makes me very sad, and the regret I feel about this is something I have to let go, because I can't change anything. Lesson learned though - take the matter into my own hands if I want something badly enough.
-Not enough blog posts, quilting, hiking or bike riding...no posts, just 3 resolutions for 2015!
The ugly - okay, there really isn't anything to put here unless you want to see a picture of my varicose veins, and really, who wants to see that? ;) My life is great, and my family and I are richly blessed. Sure we have ups and downs, but isn't that what life is all about?
I'm excited to have a new year ahead of me. I just saw a quote today about how we have 365 pages of a new book to write on. I'm looking forward to seeing how our story unfolds in 2015.
Happy New Year!!
Showing posts with label sad things. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sad things. Show all posts
Thursday, January 1, 2015
Monday, November 24, 2014
NEVER!!
Let's play Jeopardy. The title of the blog is the answer. Never.
What is the question? When do I want to experience another day like November 13, 2014 again?
It started out like a normal day. Seminary first thing, then kids off to school and John off to work. I did my scriptures, got a list going for the day and was working on the "exercise" part of that list.
The phone rang, I let the machine pick it up as I was in another room and typically whoever is calling is someone I don't want to talk to - read, Telemarketer. Then my cell phone rang. It was Kristin.
"Mom," she said through tears, "Can you come get me?" "Can't you drive yourself?" I asked. "No" "Did you throw up?" (She had missed the day before because she was sick) "I will just tell you when you get here."
What was going on? If she wasn't sick the next place my brain went was to a car wreck. Cars are always getting hit at the High School, because, its, well, High School kids driving.
I got stuck behind a de-icer truck on the way down the hill. Really, just the way things go, but very annoying when you feel you need to get somewhere fast.
When you come to the High School from our direction, you come up to the back of it first. There was a kid talking on his cell phone outside the building. No red flag yet. Then there was another one by the trailers. Still no sign of anything unusual. But the curb full of cars in front of the building? Starting to see a little red. Then I noticed quite a few people walking out of the front doors. Wait, some of those people are adults, with distraught looking kids. Okay, starting to have a mini-panic attack for sure.
As I was walking to the building, I asked a women behind me, who was carrying a satchel of sorts, and appeared to be coming to work if something had happened, that my daughter had called crying, and probably some other rambling. I assume I was rambling because she just kept saying she was sorry and that she was just getting to work. (Now, I feel stupid about that, but I'm sure she understands.) By the way, red flags are waving all over the place in my head.
When I walked into the building, I was in full panic mode. Several police officers were standing around, and the assistant superintendent, Mr. Hansen, was there, kids were sitting all along the hallway. What in the world had happened? School shooting, bomb threat? What???
Lance pointed me in the direction of the counseling center, after telling me that Kristin would tell me what had happened, and that she was okay. (Whew!! That was a good thing to hear.)
The counseling center was full of crying girls. Not just crying, but sobbing, full out wailing and weeping girls! As soon as I got Kristin she told me - one of the girls from her soccer team had taken her life the night before! I cannot really remember how I felt at that moment. Sorrow for the girls, sorrow for the parents of Devann, shock, the need to comfort, the need to cry! No doubt more, but once I was hugging girls, that was where my focus needed to be. We stayed a while, then it was time to go home and grieve and start to heal.
I never want to experience anything close to that again! In this age of school shootings, and all other evil things, you just never know what could happen to your kids, but the thing is, you don't send them out the door in the morning expecting something like this to happen. I guess that is a good thing or you would never send them out the door at all.
Such a sad, unnecessary thing to happen! So much grief! This is the 3rd teen suicide in our valley in 7 months. A counselor in our ward who knows about these things is getting worried. There is an element of contagion in suicide. The scary thing is that the girl's parents knew she was struggling. They were working on getting her better. She just couldn't handle things anymore. The other scary thing is that she was a darling girl. A senior who had just the week before been voted most inspirational by her soccer teammates. A girl who had been voted "Spirit of DWY" at last spring's Distinguished Young Women program. What went wrong? Why couldn't she get to a better place in her mind? What does that say to kids who are have much less going for them? If her life was so great and she still killed herself, then why should I stick around? My life is 10 or 100 or 1000 times worse! So goes the contagion.
Of course, no one knows what happened in Devann's mind that caused her to actually go through with it. No one ever will. I mourn for her friends whose lives will forever be affected by this. I mourn for kids who may decide this worked for Devann, so it will work for them, but most of all, I mourn for the family, for the loss of their beautiful daughter, and for the unfinished life she left behind. And this mama is grateful to have her little ducklings safe and alive.
What is the question? When do I want to experience another day like November 13, 2014 again?
It started out like a normal day. Seminary first thing, then kids off to school and John off to work. I did my scriptures, got a list going for the day and was working on the "exercise" part of that list.
The phone rang, I let the machine pick it up as I was in another room and typically whoever is calling is someone I don't want to talk to - read, Telemarketer. Then my cell phone rang. It was Kristin.
"Mom," she said through tears, "Can you come get me?" "Can't you drive yourself?" I asked. "No" "Did you throw up?" (She had missed the day before because she was sick) "I will just tell you when you get here."
What was going on? If she wasn't sick the next place my brain went was to a car wreck. Cars are always getting hit at the High School, because, its, well, High School kids driving.
I got stuck behind a de-icer truck on the way down the hill. Really, just the way things go, but very annoying when you feel you need to get somewhere fast.
When you come to the High School from our direction, you come up to the back of it first. There was a kid talking on his cell phone outside the building. No red flag yet. Then there was another one by the trailers. Still no sign of anything unusual. But the curb full of cars in front of the building? Starting to see a little red. Then I noticed quite a few people walking out of the front doors. Wait, some of those people are adults, with distraught looking kids. Okay, starting to have a mini-panic attack for sure.
As I was walking to the building, I asked a women behind me, who was carrying a satchel of sorts, and appeared to be coming to work if something had happened, that my daughter had called crying, and probably some other rambling. I assume I was rambling because she just kept saying she was sorry and that she was just getting to work. (Now, I feel stupid about that, but I'm sure she understands.) By the way, red flags are waving all over the place in my head.
When I walked into the building, I was in full panic mode. Several police officers were standing around, and the assistant superintendent, Mr. Hansen, was there, kids were sitting all along the hallway. What in the world had happened? School shooting, bomb threat? What???
Lance pointed me in the direction of the counseling center, after telling me that Kristin would tell me what had happened, and that she was okay. (Whew!! That was a good thing to hear.)
The counseling center was full of crying girls. Not just crying, but sobbing, full out wailing and weeping girls! As soon as I got Kristin she told me - one of the girls from her soccer team had taken her life the night before! I cannot really remember how I felt at that moment. Sorrow for the girls, sorrow for the parents of Devann, shock, the need to comfort, the need to cry! No doubt more, but once I was hugging girls, that was where my focus needed to be. We stayed a while, then it was time to go home and grieve and start to heal.
I never want to experience anything close to that again! In this age of school shootings, and all other evil things, you just never know what could happen to your kids, but the thing is, you don't send them out the door in the morning expecting something like this to happen. I guess that is a good thing or you would never send them out the door at all.
Such a sad, unnecessary thing to happen! So much grief! This is the 3rd teen suicide in our valley in 7 months. A counselor in our ward who knows about these things is getting worried. There is an element of contagion in suicide. The scary thing is that the girl's parents knew she was struggling. They were working on getting her better. She just couldn't handle things anymore. The other scary thing is that she was a darling girl. A senior who had just the week before been voted most inspirational by her soccer teammates. A girl who had been voted "Spirit of DWY" at last spring's Distinguished Young Women program. What went wrong? Why couldn't she get to a better place in her mind? What does that say to kids who are have much less going for them? If her life was so great and she still killed herself, then why should I stick around? My life is 10 or 100 or 1000 times worse! So goes the contagion.
Of course, no one knows what happened in Devann's mind that caused her to actually go through with it. No one ever will. I mourn for her friends whose lives will forever be affected by this. I mourn for kids who may decide this worked for Devann, so it will work for them, but most of all, I mourn for the family, for the loss of their beautiful daughter, and for the unfinished life she left behind. And this mama is grateful to have her little ducklings safe and alive.
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